The Virtues the Prophet ﷺ Afforded to Women

The Virtues the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم Afforded to Women

Muhammad Adnan Chishti Attari Madani

Before the arrival of the noble Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, the mere thought of the mistreatment suffered by women is enough to send shivers down the spine. When a daughter was born to someone, their face would become dull with grief, and to extinguish the flames of anger and avoid shame, the newborn girl would be buried alive. Even if a girl was allowed to live, her life was filled with suffering and hardship. She would be subjected to physical abuse, mutilation, deprived of her inheritance, and offered as a ritual sacrifice for the attainment of water. After the death of a father, the son would at times even turn his own mother into a slave girl, and on other occasions, she would be distributed like inheritance. Women were considered as mere servants and instruments for fulfilling desires. In this state of helplessness, there was no one to aid women and alleviate their sorrows. Eventually, the dark night of oppression and cruelty that spanned many years came to an end when Lady Āminah's son, the beloved Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, graced the world with his noble presence. He bestowed upon women such honour and dignity that is exclusive to him alone. He safeguarded the rights of women in every role they played—be it in relation to daughters, sisters, mothers, or wives—and he afforded them virtues that will remain until the final day.

The virtues afforded to daughters by the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم

Before the arrival of the Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, the birth of a daughter was considered a curse, a burden, and a source of shame. Upon hearing about the birth of a daughter, fathers would become angry with their faces turning dull, and some even resorted to burying their newborn daughters alive.[1] Some people would kill their daughters and feed them to dogs,[2] whilst others would bury them alive, just as a man confessed to the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم that he had thrown his daughter alive in a well.[3] Another individual expressed regret over burying alive eight of his daughters during the days of ignorance.[4]

Once, Sayyiduna ṢaꜤṣaꜤah b. Nājiyah رَضِىَ الـلّٰـهُ عَـنْهُ came to the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم to recite the testification of faith. He narrated that during the days of ignorance, he once lost his camels. While searching for them, he arrived at a place where an old man was sitting with his camels. He states that he was just inquiring about the camels when news of a newborn child was conveyed to the old man. The old man asked about the gender of the child and said that if it was a boy, they would welcome him, but if it was a daughter, they would bury her. Sayyiduna ṢaꜤṣaꜤah رَضِىَ الـلّٰـهُ عَـنْهُ mentions that he told the old man that he wanted to buy the newborn girl, and after some negotiation, he purchased the girl in exchange for three camels. Time passed, and Islam came. During this period, he saved 360 newborn girls by buying them in exchange for two camels each, preventing them from being killed.[5] This narration illustrates the extent of the cruelty shown upon the birth of a daughter.

The Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم put an end to these injustices and honoured daughters. Being the leader of the prophets, he showed such kindness towards daughters by standing up in reverence for his own daughter Sayyidatunā Fāṭimah, kissing her hand, and seating her in his own place.[6] It is the merciful Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم who gave glad tidings of entering paradise to the one who happily raised a daughter and did not give preference to a son over her.[7] The one who takes care of three daughters, provides them with good residence and looks after them was given the glad tidings of entering paradise becoming incumbent upon him.[8] This extends to the one who raises even one or two daughters with care. Regarding the reward for raising daughters, the Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم gave glad tidings of gaining his company in paradise.[9] Those who keep their daughters happy were given the news that they will please Allah Almighty.[10]

Despite all these virtues afforded by the noble Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, can any daughter still turn away from his teachings and be ungrateful to her benefactor! Of course not, because the beloved Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم of mercy has bestowed such dignity, status, and virtue upon daughters that even if all the daughters of the world express their gratitude for their entire lives, they still cannot repay these favours.

Virtues the Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم conferred on mothers

A mother is that great figure, which when thought of, brings to mind images of selflessness, sacrifice, loyalty, compassion and kindness. But alas, before the arrival of the noble Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, in the days of ignorance, merciful and loving mothers were only subject to sorrow and being wronged.

Even today, the prevalence of neglect towards mothers in societies void of Islam’s teachings resemble the pre-Islamic era. In some cases, the very same mother who carries her child for nine months, endures the pains of childbirth and compromises on her own wellbeing to provide her child with maximum comfort, is sent to an old folk’s home. Some are even okay with sharing their homes with their pets but not their parents.. In contrast, in the religion of Islam, a woman as a mother holds a sacred position. The Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم himself bestowed countless virtues upon mothers. He gave the glad tidings of paradise being beneath the feet of mothers.[11]

The Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم gave the glad tidings of an accepted Hajj each time a person casts a loving and compassionate glance at their mother or father.[12] When he was visited by his own mother through wet nursing—Sayyidatunā Ḥalīmah SaꜤdiyyah رَضِیَ الـلّٰـهُ عَنْهَا—he spread his blessed shawl for her.[13] Once, when a Companion رَضِىَ الـلّٰـهُ عَـنْهُ asked him three times about who was most deserving of his good treatment, he صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم replied each time, “Your mother.”[14] The result of the virtues afforded to women by the Prophet was that Sayyiduna Abdullāh b. ꜤAwn رَحْمَةُ الـلّٰـهِ عَلَيْه freed two slaves when he was guilty of raising his voice in the presence of his mother.[15] Out of respect, the famous TābiꜤī Sayyidunā Ṭalq رَحْمَةُ الـلّٰـهِ عَلَيْه would not walk on the roof beneath which his mother was present.[16] While appreciating these favours of the beloved Prophet             صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, every mother should strive to follow his teachings and beautify their children by instilling in them the teachings of Islam.

The virtues the Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم conferred upon sisters

Before the arrival of the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, just like mothers and daughters, sisters were also mistreated. The biggest well-wisher for women, the merciful Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم, made brothers the guardians of sisters by proclaiming, “Whoever has three daughters or three sisters, or two daughters or two sisters, and he shows good conduct towards them and fears Allah regarding them will attain Paradise.”[17] Furthermore, he once joined his four fingers together and announced the glad tidings of his company in Paradise, saying, “Such a person will be with me in Paradise like this.”[18] The Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم also mentioned how spending on sisters was a barrier to hell-fire by saying, “Whoever spent on his two daughters or two sisters or two female relatives for the pleasure of Allah to the extent that Allah enriched them through His grace, they will become a barrier between him and hell-fire.”[19]

The Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم also showed respect to his sister (through wet nursing), Sayyidah Shaymāˈ رَضِیَ الـلّٰـهُ عَنْهَا, by 1) standing when she approached,[20] 2) spreading his blessed cloak and making her sit upon it, and saying, 3) “Ask, and you shall be given. Intercede and your intercession will be accepted.”[21] During this exemplary behaviour towards his sister, tears flowed from his blessed eyes. 4) He also said, “If you wish, you may remain with us with honour.” 5) He also extended his generosity when she was leaving by granting her three male slaves, a female slave, and even one or two camels. 6) In another meeting with her in Juranah, the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم granted her goats and sheep as a gift.[22] This beautiful conduct of his towards his sister is sufficient in teaching brothers about the importance of showing love and respect to sisters, as they truly deserve it.

The virtues the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم afforded to married women

Women, including wives, endured various injustices before the arrival of the Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم. He conferred such virtues upon wives that he declared the relationship established with one’s wife through marriage as the preservation of half of a man’s faith.[23]

He referred to the one who treated his wife with kindness as a great individual.[24] A person once asked the noble Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم about the rights of a wife over her husband, and he replied, “When he eats, he should feed her; when he dresses, he should clothe her; he should neither strike her face nor insult her [or call her ugly]; [and if separation becomes necessary,] he should not separate from her except within the home.”[25]

A righteous wife was declared as the greatest blessing for a believer after the fear of Allah.[26]

It is a mark of the Prophet’s benevolence that women have been blessed with the provision of pure, lawful sustenance and the privilege of drinking milk, something which they were deprived of before Islam. It is narrated by Sayyidunā ꜤAbdullāh b. ꜤAbbās رَضِىَ الـلّٰـهُ عَـنْهُما that the Arabs used to declare milk to be forbidden for their wives but consumed it exclusively themselves. Similarly, when a nanny goat gave birth to a male kid, it was considered the property of men, and if it were a female kid, they would not sacrifice it and instead let it go, and if it were carrion, they would all participate in [consuming] it. Allah Almighty prohibited such actions among Muslims.[27]

Thus, the countless virtues the Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم afforded to women warrant that every woman—whether it be a mother, daughter, sister, or wife—should hold dear his teachings and strive to live her life in light of them. The Messenger of Allah صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم honoured every relationship of a woman, be it a daughter, sister, aunt, maternal or paternal grandmother. He stated, “One who supports two daughters or two sisters or two maternal aunts or two paternal aunts or a paternal or maternal grandmother, he and I will be like this in Paradise.” He joined his index and middle fingers together.[28]

In short, women as mothers, daughters, sisters, and wives have been granted such honour, respect, and status by the beloved Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم that no worldly law, religion, or culture has ever provided. The Prophet صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم demonstrated such kindness to women that no woman should ever forsake Islamic teachings to adopt the manners, clothing, behaviour, eating habits, manner of interaction, and so on, of others. Every woman should spend her life in obedience to Allah and His Messenger صَلَّى الـلّٰـهُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم.