Imam of Ahlus Sunnah’s Advice for Parents

Blessed Islamic scholars have not only given us guidance on other matters of life, but they have also given us guidance on the rights of children and their upbringing from time to time by providing ‘Points about Upbringing’. Though many books with brief and detailed information about the rights of children and their upbringing have been written, but a booklet with brief information, part of Fatawa Razawiyyah, namely ‘مَشْعَلَةُ الْاِرْشَادْ فِی حُقُوْقِ الْاَوْلَاد’^[1] authored by Imam of Ahl-us-Sunnah, A’la Hadrat Imam Ahmad Raza Khan رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه, is the essence of blessed Ahadees. Following are some selective points for the parents about their children derived from this glorious booklet:

1     Right after the birth of a baby, give Azan in the right ear four times and Iqamat thrice in the left ear of the baby so that the baby remains safe from satanic influence and epilepsy.

2     Request a blessed scholar or a pious person to give Ghutti [first food] to the newly born baby. The method of it is that the person who is going to give Ghutti should chew a date or any other sweet item and then put it into the mouth of the baby and apply it over the palate of the baby.

3     If it is not possible to perform ‘Aqeeqah on the 7^th day of the birth, perform it either on the 14^th day or the 21^st day of the birth of the baby.

4     Get the head of the new born baby shaved.

5     Give charity in silver equal to the weight of the hair.

6     Apply saffron to the head of the baby.

7     Give good name to a child.

8     Give in a proper manner what the child asks for.

9     Avoid addressing your child with a bad name even out of love because once a name becomes popular, it becomes difficult to quit it.

10   Treat these Allah’s trusts with love and affection.

11  Do not make false promises when coaxing your child because it is not permissible to even make the false promises to a child. Make promises to them if you intend to fulfil it.

12   If there are few children, distribute things amongst them equally. Do not prefer one child to the other one.

13  When you return from a travel, do bring some gifts for them.

14   When they start speaking, teach them to recite “Allah, Allah” and complete ‘Kalimah Tayyibah’ ‘لَا اِلٰەَ اِلَّا اللّٰەُ مُحمَّدٌ رَّسُوْلُ اللّٰە’.

15  When children start behaving in a sensible manner, start teaching them how to stand, sit, eat, drink, etc.

16   Urge your children to keep reciting Glorious Quran even after they have completed it.

17   Teach your children Islamic beliefs as a child is naturally born for accepting ‘Islam’ and truth. Anything that is told to a child in the early age remains firm.

18  Inculcate the devotion and reverence for the Beloved Rasool صَلَّى اللّٰەُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم into the hearts of your children, for these are the essence and absolute Iman.

19   Provide your children with the devotion and glory of the pious predecessors because these matters are the source of the safety of Iman.

20   Start asking your children verbally to offer Salah when they become 7 years old.

21   Be gentle to your children while teaching them.

22   On a suitable occasion, make your children understand but do not curse them because this might lead to more aggravation.

23   During the study period [schooling, etc.], fix a playtime for children so that they do not get bored.

24   Do not let your children have bad company at all because bad company is more dangerous than a venomous snake.

25   Do not ask him to do any such work which he might refuse to do in a commanding tone but rather ask him to do it with gentleness in a manner as if you are suggesting him so that he stays safe from the sin of disobedience. (Fatawa Razawiyyah, vol. 24, pp. 451 to 455, summarised)

May Allah عَزَّوَجَلَّ enable us to continue to bring our children up according to the blessed teachings of Imam of Ahl-us-Sunnah رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه.

اٰمِيۡن   بِجَاهِ   النَّبِيِّ  الۡاَمِيۡن      صَلَّى  اللّٰهُ  عَلَيۡهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم

While sitting on the sofa, Mr. Junaid said: O beloved daughter, Hafsah! What is the matter? You are looking very upset.

Hafsah humbly said: Yes, dear father! I was solving mathematical problems. I have solved all the problems except for the one I am unable to solve.

Mr. Junaid stroked Hafsah’s head and said, ‘Let me help you.’ Saying that he took the copy in his hand and solved the problem, making her understand in an easy way.

Out of joy, Hafsah said: Great dear father! You have eased my difficulty. You have solved it very quickly indeed.

Showing affection to her, Mr. Junaid said: Let me share a true story of a great Islamic scholar about maths. ‘Dr. Sir Ziyauddin’, the vice-chancellor of a university got his education from Europe and he was one of the top-ranking mathematicians of the subcontinent. He faced difficulty in a mathematical problem. He tried his best to solve it but he could not. So, he decided to visit Germany for solving the problem. One of his friends, ‘Maulana Sulayman Bihari Sahib’ suggested to him, ‘Visit Bareilly and get your mathematical problem solved by A’la Hadrat رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه’. Surprised, Dr. Sahib said, ‘What are you saying? Can an Islamic scholar, who has never studied at a college, solve the mathematical problem? Not at all; I cannot waste my time by going to Bareilly.’

Doctor Sahib’s friend insisted firmly that he should visit A’la Hadrat. After all, he visited A’la Hadrat رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه. A’la Hadrat was suffering from illness, so, Dr. Sahib said, ‘Honourable Shaykh! The mathematical problem I have brought is very difficult, this will take time. Should I explain it when you are comfortable and feeling relaxed?’ He رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه said, ‘You can explain it now.’ When Dr. Sahib put up the mathematical problem in the court of A’la Hadrat, he رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه solved it immediately. Having listened to the answer, doctor Sahib was utterly stunned and spontaneously said, ‘Until today, I kept hearing about the ‘Ilm-e-Ladunni (i.e., the knowledge gained without reading books, Divinely-bestowed knowledge), now I have witnessed it myself. I had made a firm intention to go to Germany but my friend guided me.’ A’la Hadrat رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه presented doctor Sahib with a booklet written by him. Dr. Sahib was amazed to see it and said, ‘I travelled to many countries for acquiring this knowledge and spent a huge amount of money for this but here before the ocean of knowledge you possess, I am merely no less than a child learning just in a Madrasah. Kindly tell me who is your teacher in this field?’ A’la Hadrat رَحْمَةُ اللّٰەِ عَلَيْه replied, ‘All this is the mercy of the Beloved Prophet صَلَّى اللّٰەُ عَلَيْهِ وَاٰلِهٖ وَسَلَّم.’

Hafsah: Dear father! Was A’la Hadrat an Islamic scholar or a mathematician?

Mr. Junaid: He was not only a great Mufti and Islamic scholar but also well-versed in, not one or two ‘branches of sciences’, but more or less 55 different fields or subjects.

Hafsah: What was the name of A’la Hadrat?

Mr. Junaid: The blessed name of A’la Hadrat was Ahmad Raza Khan.

Hafsah: Why is he called ‘A’la Hadrat’?’

Mr. Junaid: This is his title because A’la Hadrat, in his time, had the greatest knowledge as compared to all the contemporary blessed Islamic scholars. It is for this reason that people call him by his blessed title ‘A’la Hadrat’.

Expressing her desire, Hafsah humbly said: How did you gain information about A’la Hadrat? Upon this, Mr. Junaid got up and went to the bookshelf and brought 2 booklets for Hafsah. While giving her, he said to her, ‘These are two booklets, namely ‘A Brief Biography of Imam Ahmad Raza Khan’ and ‘Bareilly to Madinah’ written by Ameer-e-Ahl-e-Sunnat ‘Allamah Muhammad Ilyas Qaadiri دَامَتْ بَرَكَاتُـهُمُ الْعَالِيَـه. Read these booklets.’

Hafsah: Dear father! I have got some homework left to do, so, I will read these booklets after completing it, اِنْ شَـآءَ اللّٰە.

Mr. Junaid: Well said dear daughter. Ask me if you are unable to understand anything.

Hafsah: Sure! I will ask.