Islam and Women

An Eye for an Eye

Umm Milad Attariyya

Family, relatives, and loved ones are a gracious boon from Allah. In grief, they support us, and in prosperity, they share our happiness. To function, society needs these positive ties and relationships. No wonder then that, on numerous occasions, the Quran and hadith emphasise the importance and rights of relatives. However, ties among relatives quickly turn sour when they deviate from the teachings of Islam and heed the whims of the carnal self. Jealousy and rancour are just two of many poisons which spoil the bond between relatives and loved ones and what was once a blessing transforms into a painful hardship. Everyone must avoid such things to protect others and themselves from harm. In this article, we explore the key behaviours that threaten family ties and how we can address them.

1. One of the significant unpleasant habits found in relatives is that they compare themselves to others. For example, questioning why a relative greeted another person but not you or why you did not receive the invitation for the get-together. These are trivial matters, yet people create an uproar over them and vengefully mistreat others because of them, ultimately severing ties. Such vindictive behaviour could not be farther from the teachings of Islam. For the sisters who fall prey to these evils, the solution is to work on positive thinking about others and to make excuses for their fellow believers..

2. Some people cajole their relative into revealing their private shortcomings and will empathise with them. However, they then expose the person’s faults to the rest of the family. This is an extremely toxic act.

3. Some sisters ignite arguments between relatives by mentioning the faults of one to the other.

4. Being courteous to rich relatives and dismissive of poor relatives is a loathsome act. It is like sowing seeds of hatred in the heart.

5. Treating strangers with kindness and looking down on your relatives is extremely unethical.

Such women should immediately abandon these unhealthy habits. Fear Allah and repent sincerely. Remember, the punishment of Allah is severe. If we treat someone badly today, the same can happen to us in the future. May Allah Almighty grant the Muslim women the ability to refrain from adopting these bad habits.

اٰمِیْن بِجَاہِ خاتَمِ النَّبِیّیْن صلَّی اللہ علیہ واٰلہٖ وسلَّم